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Posted by Andy Brown on 30 March 2012
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Why the Easter Bunny uses SQL Server, not Access
I've blogged previously on why Santa doesn't use Microsoft Project. Continuing the seasonal theme, here's why the Easter Bunny doesn't use Access, preferring to store his data in SQL Server instead.
The Easter Bunny holding two of his many deliveries.
Speed of Access
There are a lot of children in the world, and a lot of Easter Eggs to deliver. The Easter Bunny tried using Access, but found that once he got beyond about 100,000 records queries started to run fairly slowly.
The Easter Bunny got a bit tired of having to solve problems with Access databases. He found that repairing a database rarely solved the problem, and instead ended up having to:
- Create a new database; then
- Import all of the objects from the old database into the new one.
By contrast, SQL Server is ultra-reliable!
Whisper it, but the EB doesn't work alone: he has an army of helpers (primarily pixies and elves) to help out. When they all go online at once, Access just can't cope; Access is fine for a small number of simultaneous users, but not for large groups. Search for When to Migrate from Microsoft Access to Microsoft SQL Server for a Microsoft article on this.
What next in this series? Why the Abominable Snowman doesn't use PowerPoint?